句中有一个非常不明显的错误，动名词 lowering 的主语问题。见例句：
1)I passed the difficult exam primarily by having worked a lot harder than others.
我通过了这个困难的考生，主要是靠比别人更努力地工作。
2)Tom went to Edinburgh by hitch-hiking. 汤姆考搭顺风车去了爱丁堡。
在这两个例句中，动名词 having 和 hitch-hiking 的主语就是句子的主语。而在 Those students … 句中，lowering academic standards (降低学术标准)的主语不是学生自己，而是学校。 虽然这个错误不明显，却是个严重的错误。
always 的位置不好。
正：Those students who enrol by being given lower academic standards can’t always finish their academic courses well.
或： Those students who enrol for their athletic excellence rather than for their academic performance often have difficulties finishing their academic courses well.
误：Some of these students couldn’t graduate timely as a result of bad exams marks.
timely：及时的，适时的。此句中应用“按时”、“准时”，最好的词组是 on time。
bad exams marks 不好，可用 poor academic performance。
正： Some of these students couldn’t graduate on time as a result of poor academic performance.
误：Even though university accept those students who have special athletic talents that will get some comment, the benefit will outweighted its disadvantages.
定语从句 that will get some comment 有两个问题：1)get comment 不好，应改为 be criticised。2)不太清楚此从句修饰主句中的哪个内容：university，students，还是 talents 一词之前所 有内容。
outweigh是正确拼写，有很多人会因为 weight 的拼写给 outweigh加字母 t。
benefit 与 disadvantages 在数上应对等，或都用单数，或都用复数。