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乘客注意 最不友好机场公布

Source:  Onion  2009-04-22  我要投稿   恒星英语学习论坛   Favorite  


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Business Week Magazine released its annual air traveler’s report this week with Prague’s Franz Kafka International Airport, ranking last in customers’ satisfaction due to long flight delays, poor service and in overall oppressive impersonal atmosphere.

The report found the average delay at Franz Kafka International is 31 hours longer than the next worst airport. We spoke to several American travelers who were reported spending weeks, and in some cases months waiting for flights.

I asked the ticket person “What gate my flight was at?” and they said that the airline I was flying didn't exist and everyone keeps calling me ass.

The airport was also cited as difficult to navigate, with a list of complaints including curbside shuttle services which loop around the airport before depositing passengers back to their starting point and extremely long corridors leading to dead ends.

Gate B2 is next to Gate B11, and Gate B14 is in the F terminal.

Business Week also rated Franz Kafka International among the worst airports in terms of customer service, calling the employers, “completely indifferent to travelers’ needs”.

“If there is a problem, fill out complaint form, and place it in an envelope addressed to the name of the hospital in which you were born.”

In response to the ranking, the airport added a public address system in an attempt to clear up any confusion.

“Departures arriving early and arrivals landing late, may be canceled or delayed without prior notice".

The airport also created a toll free customer service helpline. But when our reporters called the number this week, they found it connected them to a hat store in Stuttgart. Travelers are also reported being frustrated by the airport’s unusual security procedure, which includes a time-consuming personal interview.

The security guard asked me for like 80 minutes: Are you who you say you are? Are you who you say you are? And finally, he writes “liar” on the back of my hand and lets me pass.

Airport officials say that the complaints are unfounded.

“You must understand. All problems are travelers’ own. If you only made certain to properly follow proper protocols, no such problems would exist. Properly follow proper protocols.”

The nearby Dostoevsky Hotel also received low marks from the passengers, a large number of whom checked in due to a flight delay and ended up murdering another guest of the hotel.

Coming up, a new medical report warns getting screened for cancer is a leading cause of finding out you have cancer.

Vocabulary:

1.       ass: 笨蛋

2.       shuttle services: 班车服务

3.       protocol: A code of correct conduct


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